Too Many Animals, Not Enough Hectares

I know it’s going to be painful, but we need to move. It was just about tolerable- not great, but tolerable- up until we got the alpacas, but this is the last straw. I said that we shouldn’t get them. I said to Rob, ‘too many. Too many animals. We now have three dogs, two cats, seven budgies, six mice, two sheep, a goat, ten chickens and two turtles in the pond out the back. This is a small Melbourne townhouse, by the way. You can get to the end of our garden in ten strides, so to be fair to the dogs as animal lovers, we have to take them for three walks a day.

Now…alpacas. And Rob wants more than two. I don’t know if there exists a home in Melbourne with enough space to accommodate our menagerie, but we’re about to find out. We’ll need help, so it’s a good thing Cassandra has been raving about her buyers advocates, Melbourne’s finest property professionals, how nice it is that she and Jarred are finding a place, SO happy for you Cassandra. I didn’t say that, though, because Cassandra doesn’t let anyone else get a word in edge-ways when she’s on a roll..

So, Cassandra is a blab and I need to cut her out of my life, clearly. But she did go into detail about how she and Jarred were clueless about the process of finding a place, and they didn’t really know how to look for what they were after, and the buyers advocate set their minds at ease. I’m not that clueless, because unlike Cassandra my brain can both receive and regurgitate information, but we need expertise with this animal situation. No home buyers advocates from Melbourne should have to deal with us and the family zoo, but I shouldn’t feel too bad; finding the right property is why they’re in the game. And shockingly, we do have enough saved for a really nice place. That’s what happens when you don’t have kids and you grow and make most of your own animal food. Selling the eggs at a premium…also helpful.

-Vinque