You would think that, given we are in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, the Victorian election for the next Premier would be delayed. You would also think that, if said election was to continue anyway, people would use common sense and mail in their votes. But it seems as if everybody is going to go about this election as if nothing strange is going on in the world. We’re in the middle of a zombie apocalypse here, people! You’re going to get your brains eaten if you go to vote normally.
What about me? Well, yeah, I’ll be voting normally, but I have a good reason. I’m already walking past a polling booth on my way to pick up some building supplies. In the Cheltenham area, people really notice if you are taking on a building project. My hope is that if all of the regular humans notice me, the zombies won’t. After all, humans and zombies have totally different tastes. I know, I know, my logic is flawless.
It’s really no big deal. I’m just going to take a brisk walk to the hardware store, quickly vote for Dr Dark McBane at the local polling booth, pick up my supplies and head home. I think I have every right to be disgusted at everybody else for going out to vote when it would be safer to do so at home. I doubt many people can make the excuse of going to a hardware supply shop. Cheltenham residents need to use common sense and stay home. Except for me.
The thing is that I know I’ll be doing the right thing, avoiding zombies like they are the plague (they kind of are, though). I’ll have my hazmat suit and my laser sword to fend them off. Other people are just going to be reckless and get themselves caught, putting the rest of us in danger. So selfish.
Anyway, I’m heading off to vote and collect my building supplies. If you’re reading this, make sure you vote for Dark McBane too! We need someone responsible in charge. An evil scientist is definitely the way to go.